To every thing, turn turn turn. There is a season, turn turn turn.
After 4.5 years with Guatemala Youth Initiative, I've decided to go in a different direction. For me, a large part of this YASC experience has been leaning into new experiences as well as learning to discern where my heart is truly leading me.
When I began with GYI at 19 years old, I was working face to face with youth on a day to day basis. It was the beginning of a new organzation--each day was a new challenge. It was exhilarating and I had never felt happier. I knew that I was in the right place, and in the years after, at Middlebury, I worked tirelessly to return, in search of that same security of purpose.
In the past year and half with GYI, things were different--or maybe I was. The organization was huge--14 staff members-- and the programs were all up and running. What was needed from me was no longer to do a little of everything and make it all work together. Now I was asked to work in administrative capacities, monitoring and evaluation, program improvement and evolution. It seemed equally exciting and I dove in.
However, I felt a tug within my heart growing stronger and stronger every time I stayed in the office to run numbers or work with donors instead of working with the youth. I felt dissatisfied in a bigger and bigger way. And all of that disenchantment disappeared the moment I was asked to cover any type of educational workshop. I wasn't able to see it at first, but God was showing me a clear path forward.
I hadn't exactly known what the YASC staff had meant with their emphasis on discernment at the beginning. But then it made sense. I was discerning my path back towards an educational position, and when I finally said it aloud, that sense of security fell back into place. I knew that while Guatemala still feels like the right place, my job did not anymore.
I won't lie: resigning from the job that had seemed like my dream job felt hard. The phrase end of an era comes to mind. Everyone took it well and no one faults me for looking to follow my heart. Hard as it was though, I did not feel any regret when I left. I guess that's what successful discernment looks like.
For these last couple of months of YASC, I'll be staying in Guatemala and working more closely with Bishop Romero in other educational projects, which I'll be sure to detail here. I feel incredibly grateful to YASC for supporting me in both of these chapters, and trusting me to listen to where God is leading me.
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